January 2012
Inadequate.
I’m going out somewhere tonight and hopefully I will make a good impression on these people and they will adopt me into their friendship group.
I’ve been having so much work and studying and problems to deal with this week and I really wish to pause it all for a while and just sleep or not exist or something.
I nearly had two emotional breakdowns in school today.
a) I think I know that school is getting to me when I almost emotionally break down in the middle of biology class because I can’t understand something. I don’t think it has ever taken me so much to understand a concept.
b) I found out I’ve been pronouncing the word ‘epitome’ wrong my whole life. I sat in my...
I’ve been trying to write a very frustrated paragraph for 30 minutes now. My parents have just informed me that we will be moving back to America after this school year due to us not having any more money to be able to stay here. My parents often ask me what’s wrong with me and why I’m acting so angrily towards them and why I never come out of my room. I’m just really...
Nirvana playing on max volume means stay out of my room because I don’t want to talk to or see anybody.
I often feel like my perspective on things is too neutral. It’s occurred to me on so many different occasions when I’ve either stood at a different angle looking at something, or just generally opened my eyes more and looked somewhere other than at my feet, that my surroundings often get blurred out. It’s like I don’t notice anything more. I want a more skewed perception of...
Hung out and met a new friend today! I think it went rather well. Obviously I’m the queen of first impressions and therefore managed to spill this guy’s coke on his white shirt. Maybe this is why I don’t go out…
I’m not actually that bothered about not having much friends anymore. I mean they’re not essential. Or maybe they are, but I’ve grown accustomed to being without them I guess. On another note though, things with the long-distance boyfriend aren’t going too well because I’m still holding a grudge about him lying about everything. He wants me to be more needy/clingy...
“Man, man, it’s a funny world,” he said. “We’ve got everything, but we can’t have...”
– Notes of a Dirty Old Man, Charles Bukowski
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Plato: For the greater good.
Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.
Machiavelli: So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.
Hippocrates: Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its pancreas.
Jacques Derrida: Any number of contending discourses may be discovered within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and each interpretation is equally valid as the authorial intent can never be discerned, because structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!
Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.
Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let it take.
Douglas Adams: Forty-two.
Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.
Oliver North: National Security was at stake.
B.F. Skinner: Because the external influences which had pervaded its sensorium from birth had caused it to develop in such a fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while believing these actions to be of its own free will.
Carl Jung: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and therefore synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.
Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.
Ludwig Wittgenstein: The possibility of "crossing" was encoded into the objects "chicken" and "road", and circumstances came into being which caused the actualization of this potential occurrence.
Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
Aristotle: To actualize its potential.
Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.
Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing events to grace the annals of history. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurence.
Salvador Dali: The Fish.
Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.
Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.
Epicurus: For fun.
Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.
Johann von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.
Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.
Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was on, but it was moving very fast.
David Hume: Out of custom and habit.
Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it [censored] wanted to. That's the [censored] reason.
Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?
Ronald Reagan: I forget.
John Sununu: The Air Force was only too happy to provide the transportation, so quite understandably the chicken availed himself of the opportunity.
The Sphinx: You tell me.
Mr. T.: If you saw me coming you'd cross the road too!
Henry David Thoreau: To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow out of life.
Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.
Molly Yard: It was a hen!
Zeno of Elea: To prove it could never reach the other side.
Chaucer: So priketh hem nature in hir corages.
Wordsworth: To wander lonely as a cloud.
The Godfather: I didn't want its mother to see it like that.
Keats: Philosophy will clip a chicken's wings.
Blake: To see heaven in a wild fowl.
Othello: Jealousy.
Dr. Johnson: Sir, had you known the Chicken for as long as I have, you would not so readily enquire, but feel rather the Need to resist such a public Display of your own lamentable and incorrigible Ignorance.
Mrs. Thatcher: This chicken's not for turning.
Supreme Soviet: There has never been a chicken in this photograph.
Oscar Wilde: Why, indeed? One's social engagements whilst in town ought never expose one to such barbarous inconvenience - although, perhaps, if one must cross a road, one may do far worse than to cross it as the chicken in question.
Kafka: Hardly the most urgent enquiry to make of a low-grade insurance clerk who woke up that morning as a hen.
Swift: It is, of course, inevitable that such a loathsome, filth-ridden and degraded creature as Man should assume to question the actions of one in all respects his superior.
Macbeth: To have turned back were as tedious as to go o'er.
Whitehead: Clearly, having fallen victim to the fallacy of misplaced concreteness.
Freud: An die andere Seite zu kommen. (Much laughter.)
Hamlet: That is not the question.
Donne: It crosseth for thee.
Pope: It was mimicking my Lord Hervey.
Constable: To get a better view.
Yeats: She was following the Faeries that sang to her to come away with them from the dull, bucolic comfort of the farmyard to the waters and the wild.
Shelley: 'Tis a metaphor for the pursuits of man: though 'twas deemed an extraordinary occurrence at the time, still it brought little to bear on the great scheme of time and history, and was ultimately fruitless and forgotten.
Tolkien: Chickens are respectable folk, and well thought of. They never go on any adventures or do anything unexpected. One fine spring day, as the chicken wandered contentedly around the farmyard, clucking and pecking and enjoying herself immensely, there appeared a Wizard and thirteen Dwarves who were in need of a chicken to share in their adventure. Reluctantly she joined their party, and with them crossed the road into the great Unknown, muttering about how rude the Dwarves were to take her away on such short notice, without even giving her time to brush her feathers or fetch her hat.
Netanyahu: He didn't cross the road, you anti-Semite. Stop delegitimizing Israel.
I’ve been watching so much Cold Blood and reading so many homicide cases that there is no way I am not going to have a terrifying dream about being murdered tonight. I’m also doing my extended essay on psychopathy as well. My supervisor probably thinks I’m a bit odd because of how much detail I go into when talking about specific serial killers. Oh well. We all have hobbies.
1 tag
I love you but I’ve chosen darkness.
“Where there is a crowd, run the other way and you’ll be right.”
– Charles Bukowski (via henrycharlesbukowski)
1 tag
I’m annoyed because despite how much you keep saying I mean to you, you chose to lie to me all of this time. I wish I could explain all of the hate that I have mustered up inside of me. You want to lie about everything? Go the fuck ahead. You just ruined everything.
1 tag
Every single bone and joint in my body is aching and I feel like I’m losing control of the strength in my body because it hurts whenever I try to do anything remotely physically challenging. I wish I could detach myself from my body and just not feel the pain for a bit.
“I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I’m awake, you know?”
– Ernest Hemingway (via creepingcreep)
If my mother says one more thing about the placement of my Kurt Cobain posters I will brutally kill everything she loves. :) :) :)
What I wish I could change about my way of thought is how I see myself. I mean I’ve come to terms with it a lot better now. It phases me less, I think it about it less and I guess it just doesn’t bother me as much. I try to sometimes pick out what I think the real flaws are and maybe think of ways to fix them. My only real problem is with my actual face. I don’t know how my nose...
So for my film coursework I’m meant to make a music video, which was meant to have been filmed by this weekend beccause we’re starting editing on Sunday. I only found out yesterday that it’s meant to be in for this week though so now I need to somehow spontaneously plan a music video and go out and shoot it. I’ve got no friends to ask to help me so I thought I’d go...
This is a blog post reminder for myself to write in my journal when I come back from school because I haven’t done it for the past 3 days due to the extremity of my fatigue.
Does anyone wish to recommend me some happy/upbeat-ish songs sung by females?
Hey. I’m okay today. That’s pretty much it. My blogging has been increasingly reduced due to schoolwork and other participating factors. I write in my journal every day though! + We’re finally doing criminal behavior in psychology now and I’m extremely happy about this because of my serial killer obsession and for once I’ll actually be excited to attend a lesson.
1 tag
Today was okay. I’m trying.
My dad keeps walking into my room and asking “What’s wrong with you?” as if I’m meant to have some solid answer as to what I think could potentially be wrong with me. What’s wrong with you.
i just really hate myself and it’s starting to take a toll because i can’t get out of bed and all i do is cry. i don’t want to be alive. i’m fucking pathetic.
Woke up and started crying for about an hour or two, and couldn’t get out of my bed. I have terrible thought trains and I wholeheartedly wish they would go away. I feel like I’m useless against myself. I’m not sure how much longer I can keep at this.
Things I ended up doing today:
I actually did go and feed ducks! It was amazing. They were more wild ducks though so whenever we threw one piece of bread they all savagely started running towards us. Then seagulls started to charge towards us and then dove’s or something and we basically had a flock of birds following us.
Unfortunately, Steve Madden didn’t have the boots that I...
Things I’m going to do today:
feed ducks
buy new boots
buy a calender
1 tag
I’m wearing your shirt and it smells like you and I’m not someone to usually be a sucker for this kind of stuff but I guess I kind of am.
I want you to move on and find a person or a hobby that can make you happy because I think it’s stupid that you’re waiting around on me for so long because I know you think I’m worth it or something but I’m really not. I want you to be okay and forget about me. It’s stupid that you think so well of me. Find something better. Please.
“Man it’s a good thing I’m skinny or else I would be really fat right now.” What I just said before pausing momentarily to think about what I just said.
I feel like I have a terrible (but realistic) outlook on life and that’s pretty much why I’m always so fucking unmotivated to do stuff. I can’t change my outlook, but I need to find a way to do all this crap without wanting to stab myself in between.
So I’ve found a place in Sharjah where you can go and do archery for a price. It’s the closest place I could find to here and I guess it’s not too bad. I would just love it if I could find someone to come do it with me. “Hey, do you wanna go do some archery with me sometime?”
